Re: You Can't Do What You Want By Doing Something Else
Posted: Oct 6, 2009 7:18 AM
YOU CAN'T DO WHAT YOU WANT BY DOING SOMETHING ELSE
I WANTED to have a great job; I WANTED to earn a lot of money, I WANTED to have a huge house in an up-market area and, I WANTED to have an understanding, loving and pretty wife.
If I got all this, wouldn’t life be perfect?
I wanted and wanted and wanted, but I COULDN’T, for reality of life was not about WANTING, but about balancing your WANT with your other priorities and responsibilities.
1. I WANTED to find a good job, which allowed me to carry home a huge salary, but compulsions and pressure forced me into a profession for which I lacked qualification. So, I had to make-do with whatever came my way. I didn’t excel in my career, but did I actually fail?
For, if God prompted me to buy property, which multiplied manifold, it was not my intent or my WANT, but my destiny. If I am staying in a large dream apartment, in a well known locality and have my very own office, it wasn’t even in my dreams, forget about wanting. If it has happened, it is the twist of destiny and not my WANT. I must add though, when the opportunity arose, so did my want.
I lost my job in an MNC, due to internal politics . With the PF amount, I bought an office space, which multiplied six times in value, over the last nine years. Had I not left the company, I would have never thought or bought this place. While in the company, I would have never been able to spare that amount.
So, if God maneuvered events to benefit me, reality took me beyond my want.
2. Then again, had I been working, I would have been driving a Maruti 800 cc or some low-end vehicle, given to me by my office. I would have never owned my own high-end car, which I do now.
3. In marriage, I WANTED a beautiful wife, but finally ended up giving preference to education over beauty. I thought an educated wife would bear me intelligent children. This was to overcome my own mediocre student-hood.
Here again, WANT had been overcome by other priorities. Today, after 30 years, I can say, I didn’t have an ideal married life, but we are still together. I compromised on my choice of a life partner and lost out of many of the dreams I wished to live, but it paid dividends in other respects.
Now, that my goal is fulfilled, would I marry again to live my dream? In no uncertain terms, let me say – NO. Compromises, at times, are worth it.
4. I never earned enough in my job to BELIEVE I could send my elder son overseas for his studies. But today, if both my sons are in the US, one having completed his Masters and well settled, and the other doing his MBA, it was far beyond an ordinary man’s WANT, but it happened.
Had I thought about it earlier, I may have WANTED it, but it would have been considered as a foolish man’s absurd demand. But now, when it has happened, how do I define it or how can I take credit for it?
Life is not always about what one WANTS, for want is ‘an effort’ to live one’s dream. At times it gets fulfilled and at other times it remains unfulfilled. So, I wonder whether WANT is the ultimate tool towards meeting one’s goal or happiness.
By no means can I claim to have led an ideal life, but, would you call me a failure? I may not have lived my ultimate dream, but in the end, I am satisfied.